Nostalgia...

Believe it or not, I used to have it all. The girl, the friends, the confidence, the health, the respect. But now I have been reduced to using past tense words, and nostalgic phrases. Could there really have been a time where I possessed it all? Maybe. It sounds like centuries ago. Or 262 days ago. I have defined my objectives, but then what? I will never be the same again, but I'd like very much for things to go back to the way they were.

This feels like a punishment. Like prison. Maybe not maximum security, but enough of it to make escape seem unlikely. In all honesty, I have lost faith in religion. I refuse to believe in religious "Shamans" and various powers of priests. I believe that religion is a way to explain the unknown phenomena which occurs in nature. Religion is also used as a deterrent for crime, and other deconstructers of society. Religion has many places in the world, but now I believe it has no place with me.

Sometimes I just freeze. And I think. Why me? How did it happen? What could I have done? The problem is that religion offers no answer to these questions. If it is because I have sinned (absence of faith is considered a great sin), then what about those who have sinned far worse than me? And if this is for the better, then why do I suffer so? It's funny how even though I've always lived my parents, I feel like I lost everything now, that I have had to come here. I feel this is a sign. It is time for me to grab ahold of that independence I so dearly wished for. Now I can get it, but I must fight for it.

Viva la Revolucion

On a brighter note, I got a hold of my mom's digital camera, so I'll probably be taking pictures and stuff as I feel like it, and this also means I'll be able to brush up on my Photoshop skills too :)